Barking Mad
Posted on Sun Mar 8th, 2026 @ 6:56pm by Lieutenant Colonel Shaun Bradley & Cornelius Warner MS
1,539 words; about a 8 minute read
Mission:
What Lies Ahead, Between, and Behind
Location: Marine Outpost "Vimy Ridge"
It had been a few weeks of normalcy for Shaun now, a chance to recoup his thoughts and relax a little from the constant chaos that the colony had brought about in the last little while. Vimy Ridge had grown a fair bit since it's original inception, now covering a couple square kilometers it was starting to butt up to the outskirts of Haumea. The now inner perimeter wall had multiple outbuildings just outside of it, as a few other barracks and temporary housing buildings had spread, alongside some additional training facilities, a search and rescue coordination building, and most importantly to the marines, a proper motorcade has been constructed. The roads had even been paved in, switched from the gravel that had suited the colony just fine. Probably more of note was the popping up of a few small businesses in the area catering to the marines. A couple small restaurants for food options outside of the mess hall, and even generic shops had begun to appear.
Inside the wall, many of the buildings were seeing themselves repurposed, turned into proper officer quarters and the armoury had seen a notable upgrade. The Administration building now sported it's own dedicated communications array and subspace communication system. All in all, it looked as though the Marines had settled into the facility. From his office atop the administration tower Shaun watched as two Albatrosses alighted to the ground below, depositing the SAR team. A headstrong Romulan who had settled to the town had made it clear that he was in no need of communication equipment for his hike to the mountains. When he had missed his two check ins at either of the stops his neighbour had gotten worried and asked the Marines to go looking for him. While he had been found relatively well (aside from a broken arm) he had been distraught that the Marines had picked him up and ruined what he claimed to have been the most exciting three days of his life.
He put down the cup of coffee on his desk and turned to the holotable, pulling up a map of the colony area and reports coming in of the new defensive installations the Combat Engineers had been busy installing. The bunkers, though pillbox might be more adept, offered civilian safety spaces that had their own defensive weapons. It wasn't perfect, not like a proper emergency shelter, but it would give the people some peace of mind at least. He had just finished scanning over the reports from one of the facilities when something caught his ear. A small, sharp bark. This caused the man to narrow his eyes and shut off the table. Picking up his coffee, he stepped out of his office and into the CIC to find a scene that he hadn't expected.
Running between the consoles as a black and white dog - a collie if he was to guess - and a three pack of brown and black dogs of various military pedigrees. One appeared to be a Belgian Malinois who was sitting dutifully next to what could only be assumed to be german shepherds. Or maybe something else, it was hard to tell. All of this would have been enough to draw the Colonel's ire, who had only recently rid himself of the Captain's dogs. It was the figure standing in the middle of the dog parade that made Shaun's eye's narrow in true annoyance. Cornelius Warner stood, a smug expression on his face.
A moment later the pair were standing in Shaun's office with all four dogs. The three miliary dogs had laid down in the corner and were patiently watching the fight in progress while the Border Collie had helped himself to the sofa in the corner of the office. "... don't care what you were thinking, this is a military facility not a doggy daycare," Bradley was in the middle of yelling at Cornelius, who had not once lost the smug grin.
"Oh come now Shaun, you of all people know morale is the key to a marine's heart. You all pretend to survive on chest beating and 'ooh-rah'ing about, but we know the secret. You get morale high and Marines will do just about anything they ask. And beside, you have your search and rescue teams!" He gestured towards the three dogs in the corner, the malinois chomped his teeth as if to make a point. "They are already really well behaved, having a canine unit will just add to the joy. Plus you have some MP's now, so I am sure the dogs would be handy. We both know sensors can be tricked but a dog's nose is right a hundred percent of the time!" The former spook gestured widely and grinned. Shaun let out a long heavy sigh, and then sipped his coffee.
"Fine." He grunted, then gestured to the one on his sofa, currently doing its best impression of a hot dog from a convenience store, stuck on the side of the rollers. "And this one?"
"Mascot," Cornelius said brightly. "His name is Patches, he is three, and he is really good at listening! Basically the perfect devil dog." The Lieutenant Colonel began to shake his head.
"Warner, I get that you think this is a good idea, but you can't just plop in a mascot. The boys and girls need to choose one, and I can't force it on them. So no, we aren't going to try and just make it happen," the marine said, sitting down at his desk as though it were final. Cornelius smiled that smug look again, and Shaun frowned, well grimaced more accurately. "What?"
The brewmaster rocked on his feet a little. "Well, that's a shame then, because I might have already walked Patches around tooooooo... well most of the barracks and introduced him as your new mascot. Your devil dogs are already smitten." The smile spread, and Shaun swore he looked like the Cheshire Cat in the moment the way he leaned forward. Shaun's head hit the desk and he groaned loudly. If the Marines thought they were getting a collective dog they were already attached. Scuttlebutt would have spread like wildfire across the base and even if he was able to shut down the ops centre rumour it would be too late for the grounds. "Oh, and I said you specifically were adopting him," the man added.
The combination of insults strung together made a few of the Marine's in the ops centre pause and stare at the door. They were used to vulgar language, but the way it was strung together was in such a masterpiece that only a marine of considerable experience could manage it. Some of them even blushed. A moment later the brewmaster emerged, a smug look on his as he practically pranced out of the space, no dogs in tow. "You are all going to love the new addition to your squads, or fireteams, or whatever," he said in his most flamboyant of voices and waved to the few he passed. A moment later he disappeared down the stairs towards the base and disappeared. More than a few Marines would no doubt swing by the Silver Tongue later and buy the man a drink for the new dogs.
A few minutes later a short Trill Marine Captain appeared. Asren Lehn had been chosen to lead the Search and Rescue team when they had been sent to work at Outpost Vimy Ridge, and she took her job seriously. Soon behind her was Lieutenant Shorr, the temporary head of the Marine Military Police detachment until Major Sshryriss Th'rhehren could arrive from Earth following a meeting there. The Lieutenant and Captain entered into the Colonel's office with a bit of a smirk crossing the Trill woman's face. Scuttlebutt had indeed already spread.
"Lieutenant pick two of your Marines to have and train a dog, Captain your team will get the third," Shaun said as soon as they entered. He was clearly in a mood most foul. The pair stood there looking at the three shepherds, who looked back at them. "Make sure we have appropriate kennel facilities and space for them to be trained."
"And the fourth dog, sir?" Shorr asked, trying to keep his face expressionless. He did not succeed. Shaun stared at him for a good long moment, debating whether the next bout of dressing down was good for his blood pressure. He decided against it.
"Have a dog bed brought up here. Please inform base personnel that Patches will be given the honourary rank of Warrant Officer, and your three dogs the ranks of Sergeant." It was now the turn of the two junior officers to look slightly bewildered. "Tradition is that dogs are given rank so that abuse of the animal is harming them is not only animal cruelty but offense against a fellow marine. Unless either of you object?" When both shook there head he grunted. "Then get to work."
"Berf," huffed Patches in agreement. Shaun paused to look at the animal. He hated that he was already starting to become accustomed to it. Maybe even like him.
RSS FeedCredits | Privacy Policy