You Did What?

Posted on Sun May 2nd, 2021 @ 12:44pm by Captain Luka Mahone & Cornelius Warner MS & Lieutenant Gunnar Arnason

2,625 words; about a 13 minute read

Mission: Frizzle
Location: Hospital
Timeline: MD - 1 : 2134 Hrs

Two figures materialized in front of Gunnar on the hospital transport pad. One was standing. The other was lying on the ground in what was very much a help-I've-fallen-and-I-can't-get-up position.

"At least I don't have to ask who's been poisoned," the medical officer remarked as he quickly headed over to Cornelius and ran a medscanner over him. He looked at the readings, then looked again, and frowned. "What exactly did he ingest?"

"Roots," replied the brewmaster, with a half grin. "Star annise, cloves, a handful of other spices, water, and a bunch of sugar," he added, mentally listing ingredients. He paused to think it over, trying to remember if there was anything else more exciting in the mix, and managed a little bit of a shake. "Nope, that's about it. Native roots though, I feel I should point out."

Gunnar did not facepalm. He was too much of a professional for that, and the patient was experiencing paralysis on top of psychotropic effects. Instead he looked up, brows raised, at the doctor who'd beamed in with him. "What roots does he mean, sir?" After all 99% of the native plants on the planet had roots.

'The roots I'm going to choke him with later,' Luka caught himself thinking, before his cheeks flushed in shame and embarrassment. "Roots from the caves. The science team seemed eager to do some edible experimentation after they discovered that inhaling fumes did not cause harm. I managed to catch the team before they ... got out of hand with it, and decided to take a sample to Mr. Warner just to see if a brew was even viable." Nevermind thinking he could trust the man to not pull the curious cat routine on him. "I didn't expect him to actually ingest the first stages of the brew, and if I had, I'd have gone to brew it myself."

He shot Gunnar the 'Yes I know, I know,' look in his direction. "Or I would have at least brought a poison control kit with me."

That Mahone had even considered trying to brew it by himself wasn't a particularly comforting thought. Gunnar briefly pinched the bridge of his nose, resisting further comment. Luka was the Captain and there was a patient who needed an antidote. He used the osmotic on the poison kit to pull a blood sample for analysis. The device whirred for a moment before scrolling the results on its screen. "Fortunately, it appears to be more paralytic than poison," Gunnar noted, tapping a sequence on the screen and then loading a hypo and pressing it to Warner's neck. "That should take care of the worst of it, though you may have some itching and muscles aches later."

As his body began to loosen, the man on the floor couldn't help but chuckle as the effects of the spray took effect. "So, nothing worse than a good workout gives I suppose," Cornelius said with a sly smile. From his vantage point on the ground he looked up at the gathered two, and felt he needed to add to the discourse, adding, "to be fair, the Captain could have tried to brew at home, the replicators can give a good approximation of equipment, and I'm sure you can find a recipe, but it would be missing pizazz. Also, you wouldn't get to spend all this quality time with me."

"Quality time that I could be spending telling the science teams that dicing it up into a stir fry is probably a worse idea," Luka pointed out. His cheeks flushed, but the expression on his face didn't scream guilt so much as annoyance. "We're both lucky it wasn't worse. That's a report I wouldn't want to write to-" he stopped himself, huffing. Best not to expose the bartender now, and no matter how much Luka protested, he really would have felt heartbroken if something worse had happened. "Whatever last of kin you have."

"Please tell me our science teams aren't using themselves as guinea pigs for culinary experiments?" Gunnar pleaded, somewhere between exasperated and resigned. He'd had an eye on Cornelius' vitals as they talked and shook his head. "It is just lucky the paralysis came on slowly and didn't hit heart or lungs first." He waved and a pair of orderlies over. "Get Mr. Warner in a bed. We'll need to keep him for observation."

Luka let out the most nervous of all laughs. "Until we can get a good hold on our new chief of science? I'm not sure what they will and won't do without supervision." He paused. "... I think the Lieutenant just transferred over... Maybe I'll just... check into Science before I head back to the Silver Tongue and explain the situation." And take away any potential paralytic/poisonous substance, before anyone else got any ideas. "I don't know where they even got the idea that ingesting it was a good idea to begin with."

"Surely they know better. They're scientists, not preteens..." Gunnar started, then realized that given the situation that sounded rather close to reprimanding a superior officer. "I mean, they shouldn't need you or a chief science officer supervising to follow basic safety protocols. But if it's an issue, I can go by and check them over to make sure there haven't been ...less obvious... ill effects from other experiments."

Luka waved a hand. "I can do that. After this, I deserve to go around and remind people that doing things like that is a bad idea." He let out a sigh. "I'm just lucky that we had all that in one cannister of experimental not-beer." He sighed. "Cornelius, how likely is it that someone is going to be uh... nosing in on what we were doing after what happened?"

The bartender considered objecting to being held, after all, he was technically a civilian and could freely stroll from a medical facility if he wanted. But also the opportunity to make sure the good doctor was correct and that none of the paralytics would stop his heart was also appreciated, so he had been content to let the pair bicker and merely listen. With the mention of his name, and being directly brought back into the conversation, he shrugged, a welcome change from a few minutes ago. "None of my staff touch anything down there that isn't in a bottle. If we'd bottled it first we'd be in trouble, but since it's going to sit in the fermentor over night now, it'll be fine." He shrugged again, this time for himself, to make sure he still good, satisfied, he shrugged a few more time. "Honestly, it's probably the safest place on the whole colony right about now. And the yeast is probably starting to break down whatever this is, or further dilute it as carbon dioxide builds in it."

"I'd caution against wishful thinking here," Gunnar advised evenly. He could still barely believe two - theoretically - responsible adults had tried making beer with roots newly discovered on an alien world and obviously not particularly well-characterized by the science lab. "It would also be a good idea to just flush it without letting those carbon dioxide bubbles carry anything ...problematic... into the air around you."

"Unless flushing it causes more problems," Luka pointed out. "I'll make sure it's contained until we can find a way to deal with it." Realistically, he wanted it scanned - not consumed - before it was too far down the fermentation process, and then what it was losing in fermentation. He could hear his twenty-something year old self screaming at him to just get rid of the damn mess, which would be sensible. But some part of him wanted to know if there was any form of it that could be consumed. Was this some scientific process that finally rubbed off on him? Or maybe he inhaled too much when he entered the science labs trying to make sure no one else had done anything ill-advised. "I'll call Davna to get a containment kit down there - little fuss, and I'll supervise so they only touch the one fermenter."

"I'd prefer you didn't touch any of it," Cornelius said, his tone shifting to a more serious note. "That equipment is sensitive, and some of it is very delicate. It's currently sealed, if you're going to destroy it, it can wait until I'm out of here." While Cornelius also wanted to keep people from poking around at his stuff, he also had concerns over the equipment being damaged and making the situation worse. "And I feel I should remind you, as a civilian, to go rooting around you'll need permission from the Civilian Council to go against my wishes." He shot the Captain a look. The man was smart enough to know that annoying the council would be far worse - but more importantly, time consuming.

It was one thing to foster an amicable relationship with the civilian side of the colony, but it was quite another to let that be used to ignore a potentially dangerous situation. "Respectfully, sir, I think I should remind you that medical does not need permission from anyone to address issues of public safety," Gunnar stated politely, if just a hair shy of the Starfleet version of 'bless your heart'. "However, I can leave it as long as the area is marked and securely locked up - provided you won't try anymore taste tests before disposing of it."

Luka held up a hand. "I will take care of it." He shot Cornelius a return look. A look that said 'I will invoke the name of all the pencil-pushers at SFI if I have to.' "No equipment is going to be touched. I wouldn't know where to begin with that anyways. I'm just going to section off the area until you're better and then we can both take care of it then - responsibly," he added, giving Gunnar a less severe glance. He didn't need to touch a damn thing to do a tricorder scan at a safe distance. Nevermind that he wasn't sure if he was going to actually dispose of it. Too many variables. "I trust that no one will touch it if Mr. Warner does, but I just want to take the extra precaution. I got us into this mess, least I can do is clean it up and take responsibility for it."

"I'll leave it to your judgment, sir," Gunnar said, and tapped something into a PaDD, which he handed to Luka. "But this is the formula for the antidote. Just in case."

Luka let out a long, belabored sigh, taking the device. "Here's to hoping we won't need this again." "Keep me posted on his condition and if it changes, please." He was already beside himself that he let it happen to begin with. Reckless as it may have been and as annoyed as he was, Luka had a responsibility to not let it worsen. "I'll have to track down where this first suggestion started so I can spread news of the results of it like wildfire. Maybe it will deter some people..."

"I certainly hope so." Gunnar glanced at Cornelius. He had been entirely too relaxed and mellow for a a poisoning patient, and where there was a high to be had, people had an unfortunate tendency to want to 'experiment'. Sadly, forbidding it might even have the opposite of the intended effect. "It obviously has psychotropic effects, as well as physiological. Perhaps classifying it as 'for medical study' would help. It's all I can do to get people to take medicine sometimes, so that might be the best deterrent."

Luka gave a solemn nod, arms folded against his chest. "That might be the best course of action for the moment. I highly doubt walking in and going 'we have to dispose of all the samples,' order or no, will receive the kindest reception. But I'd rather not make another mistake." He looked back, where Cornelius had been carted off through the door. There was a distinct look of guilt on his face. He knew what he had done. "If we do, let me know. The least I can do is add my hands to help."

Gunnar scratched a note on his PaDD. "I'll issue the orders. Based on these readings and a patient presenting with partial paralysis, no one should really question that, but it should still have your approval, sir." He started to hand the PaDD over for a signature, but hesitated, considering the type of science techs who might play with unknown potential edibles. "Unless it would be easier to get science to turn everything over by making me the bad guy."

Luka shook his head. "Oh no, if anyone gets to play the bad guy around here, it's going to be the one with all the pips. They can complain about me." He held his hand out for the PaDD. "I'd rather they complain about me than to me. I'm also mildly concerned that whatever's in these roots may not just be in the roots, so I want it... visually and technically analyzed for identification purposes - and for our scanners. You never know when it could turn up again and in what form it'll turn up as."

"All yours then," Gunnar said with a nod. He frowned considering the implications of the problem not being just in the roots. "It would be a good idea to take ground water and soil samples from the area where the roots where found. Just in case."

Luka let out a solemn sigh. It would be a sleepless night tonight, as he got this all prepared. "Water, soil, and I'll see if we can get some more internal scans that are more specific to what we're looking for." He waved a hand. "If you have any more ideas, let me know, but I'll start here, put things into motion - and make sure everything's set for Cornelius to help clean that all out when he's well-rested and ready."

He gave Gunnar a nod. "Thank you. Hopefully we'll have this all sorted out soon."

"Yes," Gunnar agreed empathically. "Thank you, sir. Having it all ready should help a bit since I'm sure Cornelius will be insisting he's ready sometime before we release him. This being the first - though hopefully last - instance of root ingestion, we're going to want to observe him and run more tests than with a standard poisoning case." The NP looked at the PaDD, thinking he should probably drop a note to Caithlyn to get Civilian Counsel buy in on that before the bar owner objected. "I'll pass this around to the civilian doctors and see who at Bray would be best to inform."

"That would be the best idea." Luka already had it in his head he was going to find at least three cases of paralyzed scientists the moment he walked into the science labs. What horror and shock. "I have to say, of the accidents that I thought I'd be enabling, I didn't think one that I would lecture myself on would be among them." He rolled his eyes, at himself, as opposed to the situation. He'd chide himself on it later.

"I'm sure you have your take on it," he continued, tossing Gunnar a sad, yet sympathetic smile, "But you can reserve it for later. I'm sure I deserve it."

With another resigned sigh, Luka turned to leave. There was much to be done, and very little time to do it in.

 

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